Living With An Alcoholic Mother – Preserve Your Sanity

While you are living with an alcoholic mother, it's totally normal for you to experience burning anger and resentment. You have suffered her vindictive, abusive behavior every time she's been drinking. You have had to take care of her when she has been riding her alcohol abuse addiction roller-coaster. And how many times you have listen to her apologies and promises to be a better mother, a better person?

At times, your anger and resentment becomes nothing but a grey numbness. It’s a coping mechanism. You love your mother. You don’t want to abandon her but you don’t want to continue the misery of living with an alcoholic parent either. You have no idea what else you can do and you feel like your sanity is slowly eroding away.

The first step towards being happy and whole again while you’re living with an alcoholic mother is to identify the myths that you’re living into.

Myth #1: I have to fix it.

Fact: Your mother's alcohol abuse addiction is her own problem and her own responsibility to take. Not yours.

When you react to your mother’s alcoholic behaviour, you allow her alcohol abuse addiction to control you. Focus on other things in your life instead of being so consumed by your mother’s alcoholic behaviour.

Stop rescuing her. Let her deal with the problems she creates while she’s been drinking. Only interfere if she is going to hurt herself or hurt others. The more you try to fix the problems she creates due to her alcohol abuse, the longer she stays being an alcoholic.

Myth #2: It's my fault that my mother is an alcoholic.

Fact: Your mother is an alcoholic because she has given in to the addictive power of alcohol.

Feeling guilty about your parent’s alcoholic addiction is an impact of your mother’s drunken tirades where she had continually blamed you for her unhappiness. Only your mother can control her own happiness. She is the only one responsible for her own actions even if she is an alcoholic.

Myth #3: If I try hard enough I can change her alcoholic addiction.

Fact: You have ZERO control over her drinking problem and you cannot change or fix your mother's addiction.

The only person who can fix your mother's alcohol addiction is herself. However, the good news is that you have the choice to adequately respond and not react to your mother's alcoholic behavior. Take great care of your own well being. Protect your own emotional, mental and spiritual health while you are living with an alcoholic. Do not react to her abuse and do not rescue her.

Myth #4: I do not need education about alcoholism.

Fact: Regardless of the numbers of years you've been living with an alcoholic it doesn't mean you know enough about this destructive disease called Alcoholism.

Alcoholism is a very complex disease. It is difficult to deal with it due to the numerous physiological and psychological factors that are deeply incorporated in its development. Educate yourself about alcoholism and get to know the strongest contributing factors to its development if you really want to help your alcoholic parent overcome her alcohol abuse addiction.

Living with an alcoholic mother requires you to breakthrough those myths so you can preserve yourself and your sanity. Think about it, if you crumble as a result of living with an alcoholic how is it going to impact your mum and your personal future? Set yourself free so you can really help yourself and your mum.


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